I’m laying here in my bed at 3am thinking about what I wanted to do for Memorial Day this year. And this year I want it to be a celebration of how far I’ve come and how happy I am.
Funny, in order to do that I felt the need to remind myself of where I was last year on that day. I had no house of my own as I was renting my sister’s house, my parents were in town helping me, I was flat on my back in an incredible amount of pain living on a bed in the living room, I had canceled cervical spine surgery two weeks prior and I didn’t have a clue what I was going to do about the problems with my neck, I was officially divorced three weeks, I was in the midst of a disconnect with my son who I have always had an incredible connection with, the friends I thought I had were not showing up in my life the way I thought they would and I couldn’t physically write which had always helped me process such things. I was alone in my thoughts and I had officially hit the lowest point in my life. So I cried most of the day.
I knew full well I was in the valley of darkness. And although on this day I had no idea how I was going to get out, I knew somehow I would. I knew I had to cry those tears and feel that pain. And so I did.
And here I am on the other side of that valley shouting from the mountaintop how happy I am. We all have our journeys and I am choosing to embrace every part of mine. Thank you for the sadness so I can appreciate my happiness.