4/27/12 So Mary and I have continued our Facebook conversations and during the day today she sends me her phone number and asks me to text her. I get the message just before I have to pick up my son from school. I hesitate texting her. Somehow it seemed “safe” to just be chatting on Facebook and now the idea of texting scares me. Should I? Or shouldn’t I? I plug the number in my phone, get in my car and before leaving I send a text saying “hola”. After I sent it I can’t breathe. I mean literally, I am trying to catch my breath, my heart is pounding and I am taking deeper and deeper breaths. I didn’t understand what was happening to me. This is crazy!
I keep checking my phone. Nothing. I keep breathing deeper and deeper. My mind is a blur. What the heck is going on with me?! I’m back to thinking I’m crazy again. “Welcome back!”, says Crazy.
The ride to school is only 15 minutes. But 15 minutes of deep breathing, checking my phone and feeling crazy is feeling like an eternity. I pull up to the school and she finally texts me back, “Susan is this u?” I reply, “yup”. She apologizes that she got stuck on a job and will be free in 15 min. Unfortunately I have to go into school to pick up my son so we are unable to text and I tell her so. She tells me to give him a hug from her. My crazy side thinks it’s strange she “sends” Alex a hug but not me. So I take another deep breath, get out of the car and put on my happy Mommy face.